My First Reality Show Experience

I was assured by my agent that "it wasn't a reality show." Still, I went with low expectations and a not-so-deep-down desire to be picked. This past Monday I was part of the taping of a show for the cable channel AMC, you know, American Movie Classics? And by "classics" they mean Porky's, Risky Business, and The River Wild. Needless to say, they have a program called "Date Night" which is kind of like "Dinner & a Movie" on another channel. This program surrounds the showing of a particular movie and its requisite commercial breaks. There were eight of us guys and one "lovely" lady (she looked a lot like Cher). Throughout the course of the day, we would be interviewed and scrutinized until she was certain she had picked the best guy for her to date. At least that's the premise.

The first half of the day, us guys spent individual time in front of the camera being asked by the director about our favorite movies (Shawshank Redemption, Rudy, Chariots of Fire, Garden State), favorite comedy (Ferris Bueller's Day Off), hottest Actor or Actress (Phillip Seymour Hoffman & Felicity Hoffman), What a person's favorite movie says about them (Whether or not they are a thinking person), etc.

They also made us do an impression, something that I'm pretty horrible at. Because our "date movie" is the charming and romantic psychological thriller Silence of the Lambs I had to try to do Hannibal saying, "I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chi-an-ti." Then they asked me to do that lip-quivering-sucking-mmmthatwastastey thing. I didn't do so hot. I'm certain they will edit me to look like a baffoon. But as long as it's not a "reality show," I can fall back on the "I was just acting like a baffoon" plea. Right?

The second half was spent with each of us hanging out on a red couch with the lady d'jour. We had (hopefully) funny, engaging, flirty conversation about different parts of the movie. We talked about sewing machines (No, I don't have one), lotion ("It rubs the lotion on its skin"), and "quid pro quo." It was delightful and surprisingly natural. I might have made a new friend in this semi-Cher-like lady.

While the other guys were in the studio the rest of us sat in around and ate snack food, like mini-quiches and slim jims. They were actually pretty cool guys, and we bonded pretty quickly since we were all pretty uncertain what the heck we had gotten ourselves into. One guy even told the story of his (and his wife's) recent experience on the Dr. Phil show. They got royally scammed into thinking they were going to be helped, and instead they were made fun of. Pretty sad. I hope that's not what happens to me with this "Date Night" deal.

At the end of the night, the producer came into our little holding area and announced that they (not the Cher-girl) had picked the one guy to come back in as the "winner." It was Gary, he always wins stuff and get the cool jobs. He's actually in the running to be on "Deal, No Deal." I'm happy for him, mostly, and probably would've based my self-worth too highly on the fact that some New York producer & director deemed me "most desirable."

Besides, the prize Gary won is a pair of movie tickets. And, here's the clincher. Ms. Right already has a Mr. Right. Yep, she's married, and even has a couple of kids. That's a little too much reality for me.

"Date Night" will air March 27th, 7pm Central on AMC.

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